A Rebellious Hope

Back a few years ago, there was a contestant that crossed the Back a few years ago, there was a contestant who stepped onto the America’s Got Talent stage named Nightbirde. Ever since that audition, Nightbirde (Jane) has stayed on my mind. Her perspective on how to live despite overwhelming odds was deeply inspiring to me, and it’s something I’ve tried to apply to my own life.

During her audition, she spoke about her cancer diagnosis and the fact that she had a 2% chance of survival. She said, “I have a 2% chance of survival, but 2% is not 0%. Two percent is something, and I wish people knew how amazing it is.” Later on through her music and interviews, she described that outlook as having a “Rebellious Hope.”

For me, that idea of rebellious hope has shown up in many different areas of my life over the past seven years. I wish I could say those years have been easy, but as some know, they’ve been incredibly challenging and deeply shaping at the same time. But that’s okay. Life can be hard and beautiful simultaneously, and that’s something I’ve been learning more deeply over the last few years — the reality that two things can be true at once.

That rebellious hope showed up in my friendship with my friend Taylor during his battle with cancer, praying that God would completely heal him from sarcoma of the heart. It showed up in praying for my mom through her cancer journey. It showed up in praying for my dad through the health challenges he faced over the past year. And honestly, it has shown up in countless other moments too.

Having a rebellious hope allows light to break through even on the darkest days. It creates the mindset of, “Maybe today isn’t okay, and maybe that’s okay for now… but tomorrow might be different, and that’s what I’m going to hold onto.”

Alongside rebellious hope comes gratitude — learning to be thankful for the life we’ve been given, even in the ordinary moments. The older I get, the more I realize so much of life comes down to perspective. If you walk into every situation expecting misery, chances are you’ll only see the negative in it. But when you approach life with an “I get to” mindset instead of an “I have to” mindset, it shifts your focus entirely.

I’m learning that so many things I once viewed as inconveniences are actually gifts. Moving my body every day when I’d rather stay in bed is a gift. Paying for gas is a gift because it means I have somewhere to go. Doing yard work is a gift because it means I have a home to take care of. Even in the midst of hardship, life itself is still a gift.

It all goes back to that same truth: life can be hard and beautiful at the same time.

And when gratitude and rebellious hope come together, something changes in you. The world can feel dark. Life can feel heavy, isolating, and exhausting at times. But even in the middle of that darkness, there is still so much good and hope worth holding onto.

That same rebellious hope Nightbirde carried with her in the face of impossible odds exists within all of us too.

So shift your mindset. Change what you focus on. Hold onto hope anyway. Believe that the light of a clear blue morning is still coming, because it is — and when it arrives, it’s going to be beautiful.